Tuesday, February 14, 2012

the amusement never ends.

(through the indexing powers poured upon some of the words in this post, readers that are worlds apart shall gather here.)

just when i thought i'd better get some strong liquor to celebrate valentine's day with the ton of snow on the car, this happens:

some bearding romanian prick, using disposable y!m id's (or at least that's what i think those are), starts browbeating me about plundering my y!m id. i must admit, i blinked for several times, but it was just a side-effect of disbelief, rather than an unrestrained expression of cowering.

but, without further ado, here's his pitch:

o421451513242: ce faco¡
o421451513242: faci?
o421451513242: omule
 o421451513242: tot storci bani?

o635235225: bai pula
o635235225: vezi ca imediat te scot de pe id
o635235225: ti-l fur
o635235225: ca sa vezi cum se fura un id
o635235225: sa plangi dupa el ca dupa ciocolata cand erai mic

(for the british-american readers, an approximate translation: 'how do you di¡ / do? / man / still extorting money? / you knob / mind you, i shall forthwith log you off your id / i shall spirit it away from you / so you can see how one thieves an id / and you shall weep from being deprived of it just as you used to bewail from being pillaged of chocolate, when you were but an urchin.')

now, given the entire extortion thing, this chap may very well be in the wrong with respect to my identity; from quite a list of lawlessnesses in my past, i am in possession of no remembrance of one of such taking place.

also, considering the subtle punctuation, he's probably the ceo of la cucaracha it software hardware corp. inc. ltd. & co. - yes, i know that sounds familiar, so let me enlighten you: they are indeed the brilliant minds behind that amazing software that allows one to control the global defensive satellites from one's strawberry smartphone.

i hope i'm not throwing myself on too far a spot from reality if i state that this sort of things doesn't usually happen to people (it never happened to me); and not because we, the romanians, are god-forbiddingly falling short on idiots, but.. the expressions.. the action.. this entire thing is so ten years ago, i thought this species was extinct. well, i, for one, am ever so splendidly ready to give a hand with that.

come take it in person, bitch.